What are you supposed to do? You reached levels of interaction with her where you found her smiling, eager to spend more time with you. After nine months riding your motorcycle everyday with her, next, you approach her, but that fails. Afterwards, time and responsibilities take you away forcing you to leave her. You won’t know if she stopped smiling because you approached her, or, her feelings for you changed after you chose to leave.
Before you left her, without saying it face to face, you did everything you could to tell her specifically how you would soon return. You fail to communicate this message and now you are left in limbo. On with her life she goes, yet not once did you stop thinking about her. You fully intended and still want to find her. While you move on, plotting your course to intersect with hers, life fires curve balls left and right at you forcing you off course more than once. Sometimes for six months at a time. No matter what you do, you fail to navigate close enough to her showing you are serious. Months go by, years go by and you find yourself no closer.
Now, all you hear is silence. For almost a year she’s been silent. What motivates you and what is loud and clear are your memories of experiencing her. Images play and replay in your mind reminding you how good it felt with her, leaving you to want more of her. Instantly, you could name off a hundred details about why you love her. Humor, intelligence, energy, attractiveness, and so on. What you are left with is nothing but memories.
The idea that she is not married yet pushes you further. In the end, to me, I’m on course. Even if I’m alone, I move forward.
What would you do?